Ladies and Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains

When we got to Pam Real Thai to meet up with TO and LH for dinner tonight, we were welcomed by balloons strewn about, flowers taped to the walls, and streamers hanging on the window, because, as luck would have it, it was Pam's [something] Anniversary, which meant 20% off everything! This made us feel a little better about being late, despite the fact, we might add, that tonight we were honored with the "most punctual" award by our tennis team. Yes, we are on a tennis team.

Anyway, this whole 20% off thing only allowed us to overeat more than we usually do at Pam Real Thai, so this meant we did NOT order a popcorn when we got to Lincoln Center for a screening of this hilarious 1981 movie, Ladies and Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains, starring a very young Diane Lane (see pic) and a very young, but exactly the same looking Laura Dern. Seriously, some of the fashions in this movie were amazing, and we are surely going to think long and hard about these looks again when Halloween approaches. Do you think Diane Lane in 1981 ever thought she would make such movies as Under the Tuscan Sun (which we loved), and Nights in Rodanthe (which we would never go see)? We hope not. Also, if anyone has any verification that "You Give Love a Bad Name" was actually written about Diane Lane, please do tell.

Anyway, we then arrived home to catch the Top Chef finale, which provided the best line of the season - Padma saying about Stefan's dessert - "it was pedestrian at best." You know she heard Salman Rushdie say that a few times and vowed to keep it in her arsenal for the right moment, and relished the fact that she finally got to say it in Season 5, during the finale. Well done, Padma. At least that marriage was good for something.

Did You Miss Us? Our Site Monitor Says "No."

Every time we take a hiatus from blogging, our body just doesn't feel right for some reason. Not in the "changes" way that happened when we were 12 or 13, but in a restless leg syndrome or ADD kind of way.

Maybe the problem has gotten worse recently because of the first few hundred pages of Atlas Shrugged, which we are currently reading ("to prove to yourself you're your public interest law career is a waste of time?" asked our friend's right-wing father the other night at a dinner). In it, a few of the characters have said that the worst thing in the whole entire world is a man without a purpose. Is our purpose blogging about meaningless things? Perhaps.

Anyway, since the Bar exam experience is behind us (praise Xenu!), and we opted out of taking more of them just for fun, like some of our friends in California and Mass this week, what will we talk about? This shall remain a mystery. While our devoted fan(s) and we may not have the shared experience of day to day life at law school or bar prep, there still may be things in the world that warrant commentary. Like Top Chef. Or our mother. Or the working world and how it smells bad (but that we are thankful to have a job).

This blogging thing may get difficult at some points, because at work we sit in "pods," and our boss sits directly behind us and can at any point turn around and see what is on our screen. Oftentimes this has included facebook.com, gmail, Gossip Girl recaps, and fashion week reviews, so really, what is a little blogger here and there.

So get ready for another iteration of Fishwatch. We are beginning to feel like those "gay nights" that have moved around the City for the last 5 years, only to die a slow, painful, poorly attended death in the 30s on the West side. But we will try our best to keep a downtown, well-attended, open bar feel to this whole experience. Meanwhile, special shout-outs to ET and MC who are bar taking in other states this week. May the force be with y'all.

Mazel Tov.

Congrats to everyone for being dunzo with this miserable little experience. We will likely be back blogging in February to let you all know what it is like to re-take this puppy since today was impossible. At least at this moment we are drunker than we can say.

Hope you all have a great month off and please think of us fondly as you sit on the beach or your couch or wherever the next few weeks.

xoxo.
FW

We Wrote A Song Called "Death To ExamSoft" To The Tune of The SoftTest Tech Support Hold Synthesizer Musak...

Hello from hell.

We write to you during our third attempt to get through to a SoftTest tech support person (and by "a" person, we apparantly mean "the" person since there must be no more than one). When we did the whole auto-upload, we got a big fat error message for our AM message. We then tried the manual upload, and...you guessed it, no luck.

From 6-6:41, we stayed on hold, hoping that everytime the automated voice interruped the insufferable hold "musak" that it was an actual person. Instead, it was some woman telling us to check our exam upload history online. Um, thanks, we did that bee-yotch, and it's not there.

We then hung up and took a breather, and then spent 7-7:55 also on hold. Thinking that something must be wrong, we hung up and now we are on hold, yet again. Meanwhile, the clock is ticking down toward 11:59PM EST when our three AM session essays turn from 4 1/2 (rounded to 5) to a big fat 0.

Did we mention that this hold music makes us want to die? We don't get it, did they go home for the day?

At least there was no earthquake in NYC today, so I guess we have something to be thankful for...although that option is seeming better right now.

Update 10:10pm: Praise Xenu, it finally worked, so our 4 and 1/2's are restored.

It's The Day Before The Day of the Show, Y'all!

We, along with JH, JG, and AA went to see The Dark Knight this morning (9:30am Imax), and much to our surprise, the theater was packed. We thought maybe all the peeps in town for the Bar had the same idea as us - (which was to chill out with a really really dark and emotionally draining movie with lots of explosions and fighting), but we were the only ones doing flashcards during the previews and spotting the hearsay exception during a trial.

Anyway, we know what you are all thinking at this point, and we will all be fine, don't you worry my little reader(ship). Everyone has worked hard, even if that hard work included blogging or reading this blog, eating non-stop, napping, and incessant complaining. In fact, we have been destined for this day since birth, as shown by the 1984 New Yorker cartoon to the left (slash who among us was born in 1984 besides JF?) (Also, please don't tell on us for committing copyright infringement).

We urge you all to take the evening off and watch some Hills reruns or catch up on Project Runway and not to think too hard about how miserable the next two days will be. We hope you see you all well rested and ready to bring it in the early hours of dawn. Best of luck to all.

xoxo,
FW

Exclusive: FishWatch Flashcard Exposé

In these trying economic times of rising fuel costs, many people around the country have eschewed their hummers and Range Rovers and opted for more economic vehicles including the Yaris or Prius and such as. Much like these economically and environmentally conscious citizens, many Bar takers have thought long and hard about the size of the flashcards they created and used to study for this miserable little test. Some hoped the economy would stabilize or decided to ignore the bad signs. Others planned ahead and saved money and trees by going small. Very small.

We begin our expose with those who have decidedly chosen against economy and green-ness, and have retained larger than life flashcards for their larger than life personas.




Despite his Canadian roots, CG has basically said "F. you" to the environment and cost-consciousness as he travels around the study area flaunting these monstrous 4x6 flashcards, leaving many Bar takers to wonder how sustainable such practices really are.

Maybe the strength of the Canadian dollar helped this decision?
(Yes that is a NANO)...

In addition to making our lives miserable with books and books of impossible questions, PMBR also chose to make some people's daily lives difficult - those who were lucky enough to get their hands on them had to carry around these gi-normous flashcards, (note: also with impossible questions)...

And weren't silver hoops so SAT vocab circa 1998?

FishWatch himself went for a more middle ground option, with the standard 3x5 flashcards, balancing cost, environmental friendliness, and the need to pack in as much info as humanly possible on each since we made so few...

Notice the coffee stains on "Antenuptual Agreements,"
which we see as bad sign for our future...

And yes, our Nano screen did crack...

JH cut his 3x5 cards in half (we know because he complains about the paper cutting machine in the supply room non-stop). But we cannot make too much fun, since he lets us borrow these sometimes, and they easily fit in shirt pockets and Uniqlo skinny jeans back pockets for when you want to do some on your way to Beige, and then put them away before any normal people see you...

And they are color-coordinated! Great work, JH.

Candid!

We may never know what a Holder in Due Course is,
but at least we can look good learning.

Finally, SB (née T) sent in some photos of her tiny cards - 3x5's cut in 1/4ths!!! This is really forward thinking, b/c they can easily be turned into earrings or pendants after the exam.

Mind you, those are the small binder clips...

Believe it or not, that Goyard bag is full of these little puppies...

We wish all of you good luck this final weekend - flashcard users and non-users alike. If you see any flashcard users out on the streets this weekend - please do send in pics as we are interested to see how they hold up against the elements.

xoxo.
FW

Dylan Lauren Could Make A Killing If She Set Up Shop Near Us...

Apparently every day requires something harmful and addictive to get through the day. Yesterday, it was alcohol. Today, it is candy and baked goods.

JH's mom shipped him more jelly bellies, Swedish fish, and peachy penguins after he single handedly ate the entire previous shipment. At least this time he decided to share...





When we went to visit people in other parts of the war zone to see how they were holding up, we were confronted with this...



and this...



and this...




We are praying for passage for everyone, if only because candy and cookies are marked up 200% or so in February b/c of Valentine's Day...



...